Maturity is a strange thing. Defined as “perfect condition” or “full development”, we rarely consider maturation (or the lack thereof) as a reason for why we don’t have what we desire, when we desire it. I believe maturity is something we continue to strive towards. It’s fulfillment changes just as we change. For example, I was very mature at age 21, but not nearly as mature as I am at 26. Maturity isn’t necessarily a mark to reach but rather a concept whose face changes as we change.
While watching The Vow, I stumbled upon the concept of maturity and the power of perfect timing (If you haven’t seen the movie, I’ll do my best not to present any spoilers or go beyond what you’d read in the movie summary). In the movie, Paige, a free spirited artist, is married to Leo, an entrepreneur played by sexy Channing Tatum. The couple are involved in an unfortunate accident which leads Paige to lose all memory of their life together (ok, as I approach my next point, I’m almost sure I’m going to ruin the movie for you. If you care, stop here. If not, read on).
As her memory has disappeared, she can only remember her former life; the life where she was in law school, very close to her family, and engaged to a man named Jeremy. Throughout the movie, she is caught in between a tug of war between the life with her immediate family vs the very contrasting life that she had with Leo. No matter what he tried, Leo could not move Paige to operate in the way she operated during their marriage. Her mind was stuck and she could only be the Paige that she remembered. As the movie continues, it becomes clear that as time moved forward, the same life decisions, preferences, and realizations begin to resurface and she slowly transforms into the Paige that Leo met and fell in love with.
What’s my point? I was amazed that no matter how much Leo wanted her to be “his” Paige, she just couldn’t be. Mentally, she was the Paige of old and knew nothing of the matured, artsy, free Paige. Contrarily, as time moved, she began to make the same decisions that had upset and confused her parents before. No matter how hard they tried to keep her as “the old Paige” she was naturally moving towards her maturity. Time was her pathway to her destiny. Time had to pass in order for her to be the “new” Paige; it just wouldn’t happen any other way.
As I’ve told others, the things you desire will come in perfect timing. Effort, self discovery and completion of certain prerequisites may be required in order to reach the next level of maturity but there is never any use stressing about how and when you’ll get there. I am learning first-hand, the power of perfect timing. While we can search for formulas, answers, and short cuts, the best things in life come as you are ready for them. Stay present in the moment and trust that, just like Paige, you’ll naturally move into the you that you desire to be. In perfect timing.